Signs in Church

on Nov 20 in Flotsum & Jetsam by

Think religious people are humorless. Think again. I don’t know who assembles these or what liberties they do or don’t take, but they’re fun to read.

— The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

— Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

—- Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.

—- Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.

—- Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.

—- The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.

—- Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say “Hell” to someone who doesn’t care much about you.

— Don’t let worry kill you off — let the Church help.

— Miss Charlene Mason sang “I will not pass this way again,” giving obvious pleasure to the congregation!

— For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

—- Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.

—- The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: “Break Forth Into Joy.”

— Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

— A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

— At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What Is Hell?” Come early and listen to our choir practice.

— Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

— Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

— Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

— The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.

— Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – prayer and medication to follow.

— The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

—- This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

— Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done

—- The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.

— The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the Church,basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

—- The sermon this morning: “Jesus Walks on the Water.” The sermon
tonight: “Searching for Jesus.”

—- The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: “I Upped My Pledge – Up Yours”

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